6 tips to ensure that your marriage survives hard times
1) Acknowledge problem areas
Instead of ignoring, acknowledge when there is a problem and try to work through it together with you partner. Ignoring will only cause the problem to grow and sometimes it is best to nip the problem in the bud right when it first starts. Ignoring with almost definitely see the problem grow and worsen.
2) Try and identify your stress areas
Instead of blaming your partner for certain issues that are stressing you out, identify the area and work with your partner to resolve it. If you have a problem in the office with an overbearing, barking boss, it might be an idea to sit down with him/her and talk it through. 90% of the time, you will probably find that your boss is dealing with his/her own stresses. At least, this way, you will have faced the problem area without taking it out on your partner.
3) Face your fears
If there is an area that really scares you, talk about it. Perhaps you are behind on bond payments or school fees and you’re really scared because you know that you cannot catch them up quick enough so that your partner doesn’t notice. Fear can create bigger problems so it’s always best to talk about them together and you will find that together….you are bound to come up with a solution. Two brains are always better than one so instead of burying fear deep inside, talk about it,face it, bring it out into the open and already it won’t be all THAT scary.
4) Honesty
Good communication begins with honesty. Always be honest with one another. Try not to tell the other things that you THINK the other wants to hear because this will only lead to more pressure later on. Saying and doing are two different things. Always try to carry out what you have already verbally promised and try and take advice from your partner even if you don’t 100% agree with him/her at the time.
5) Don’t be afraid to ask for help
Ask your partner for help if you’re in a situation where you desperately need it. Don’t be afraid to do this. Whether it’s help with the children, debt, a crisis at the office…..whatever the situation is, never be afraid to turn to your partner first and discuss the problem and ask for help.
6) Have a plan
As quoted by Dr Phil once…..Dreams can motivate you to strive for the stars, but sometimes, you have to get your head out of the clouds. “The difference between a dream and a plan is a timeline….Check up on yourself every once in awhile to see whether you are really moving forward. Put a realistic schedule together that the two of you can really get excited about and work towards it.
