Getting married – the ONLY thing agreed upon
What happens when deciding to get married is the ONLY thing the bride and groom agree on…..
What when she wants the entire family from immediate right through to cousins and distant aunts and uncles and he only wants immediate family to attend the wedding. She wants a big fairytale wedding with as many people as possible but he wants to elope, just the two of them. What happens when he wants a sit down collar and tie wedding and she wants something more casual.
When both bride and groom are deciding on colour…he wants black and white and she wants pastels …. all of them…
He wants a five course dinner served and she wants snacks and fruit. He wants a special date because it’s connected to something symbolic in his life and she doesn’t ever want to have to share her anniversary. He wants a small cosy honeymoon and she wants something more flashy like an island or overseas trip. He wants to save and pay cash for the wedding but she wants to make a loan and has a hundred reasons for the decision. He wants to wait a year or two before having children and she wants to have a baby almost immediately.
Well…. this would be the first test of your ability to give… and take… and compromise. If you’re not able to, our suggestion is to postpone the wedding, indefinitely. Most times the groom will just let the plans flow and he will go with whatever the bride decides on, but, there are the odd occasions when the groom wants to have things 50/50 and when this is the case, it is important to sit down and ensure that the plans flow 50/50. Allow him to take part and “listen” to his suggestions. No two people can agree 100% always, every minute of every day but, you need to decide which are the most important decsions and tackle them and then decide on the smaller less trivial ones. Try not to let each decision create an arguement and do not ALWAYS HAVE TO WIN.
Written by Marrilyn
for The Travelling Bride.co.za
